Starting a new life is an oxymoron. We only have one life (reincarnation aside, since I’m talking about this present material life). So when I talk of starting a “new” life that is different from my “past” life, or when using words like “reinventing,”it’s important to keep in mind the following:

We get second chances. We get opportunities to reinvent ourselves. We can adjust our current trajectory. But we only have one life. We are only one person. I want to state this clearly because there’s a tendency (in me at least) to ignore and invalidate everything negative that I experienced before the present moment. If I grew up a certain way and I’m trying to live at 180 degrees opposed to that, I’ve realized that it’s important to still acknowledge the fact that that “other” life is the stool I stand on to get a greater perspective. It should not be ridiculed or minimized or ignored or suppressed.

My past is important. My future is not yet here. My present is a result of my past and a leaning toward my future. To deny the past or live in the dreamland of the future can only box me into a static, frustrated way of living.

So to clarify, living a “new” life, for me, simply means living more intentionally, with appreciation of the past and an eye toward a future of my own design, with less obligation to either nostalgia or fantasy. A new life must be based in hard reality, not some wonderland where regret and bitterness and futuristic euphoria make all the decisions.

I have one life. Part of that life, I lived in some ways other than what I now feel were not true to who I am deep inside. I am now choosing to use that perspective to live out another part (or the rest) of my life in a way that it more intentionally inclined to what I feel are the truest parts of me. And I’m sure I’ll discover a lot along the way.